I'll be staying in a Muslim village to help build the community's infrastructure for the next week and won't be able to upload any new posts for a bit. Hopefully I'll be putting up a mega blog in a week or so.
Best from Thailand,
Andrew
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Friday, June 25, 2010
Food With a Helping of People
Looking back on it, I realize that I've dropped the ball on a couple things with the blogs so far. One, I've spent an inordinate amount of time discussing bathrooms. That needs to go. Two, bathroom talk has limited the amount of food talk. That needs to happen. Three, I haven't provided any details about the people I'm adventuring with. If this was the Travel Channel, they would've kicked me off and given Samantha Brown another show. Without further ado...
The cast of characters:
Karen:
draft combine stats: Female, 5'8", blonde, mid 40s, Scottish, 5.4 40 time, 25 inch vertical...
The volunteer coordinator here at Andaman Discoveries. A young at heart type with an outgoing personality to boot, Karen hails from the land of bagpipes and kilts. She's the high-energy one of the group, the Joakim Noah type. Not excessively flashy, puts in work day in and day, and total team player. Gotta like her. Since she's Scottish, the locals here joke that they've had to adjust to learning English and Karen's English.
Bodhi:
combine stats: Male, 6' something, brown hair, Berkeley grad, newly married, late 20s or early 30s, first round status
One of the head honcos at Andaman Discoveries. He's been out of the area for most of my first week here. Just had a chance for us to introduce, but definitely has that good-guy vibe to him, really chill.
Laura:
combine stats: Female, the 23-year old Frenchie, black hair, 5'5"
She's been here since February as part of this European program that allows young people to assimilate themselves into different cultures to gain tools and experiences that they can take back home. As part of her learning experience, she's been taking Thai cooking lessons from Bodhi's wife every Tuesday. Word around the campfire is that she can make a killer fish curry. She heads back in October.
Nan:
combine stats: Female, Thai, 5'5", black hair, mid to late 20s, sat out her workouts due to an injured wrist and is listed as day-to-day.
She's one of the locals and is Laura's roommate. This is kinda neat, because it turns out that all of these people live on the same street. I think that's another really cool part about the people here in Thailand, that sense of "together-ness" with everyone and wantinng to be close to one another. Ubuntu! Maybe it's because of the air here in Thailand that causes people to behave like this. I'm starting to think any problem can be solved if people went to Thailand: healthcare, Bloods vs Crips, North vs South Korea, Snooki vs any normal human being. Also, Nan has a motorbike and, like many of the Thais here, uses it for any and all situations. Need to go 13 miles to the beach. Motorbike. Need to go back home. Motorbike. Need to go to the store one block over. Motorbike. Commitment to a cause.
Peanut:
combine stats: Female, Thai, 5'6", black hair usually tied in a bun, limited tolerance to spicy food.
Another local Thai. She's super sweet, and I love how she goes by Peanut.
Tui:
combine stats: Female, Thai, 5'6", long black hair usually in a ponytail, late 20s or early 30s.
She's been working with Andaman Discoveries for several years now. Again, she's very nice and has been our translator when need be. Can't be said enough about how nice people here are. Everywhere you go, people are greeting you and smiling like they actually mean it. None of this "hey, I don't really want to talk to you and I have to be somewhere" greeting that LA has a patent over.
Judith:
combine stats: Female, Austrian, 5'7", blonde, early 30s.
She's one of the interns with Andaman Discoveries who will be with them for the next two months. Then she'll head back to Europe to get her master's in sustainable tourism, but for right now she lives in the room across from me at the apartment. Lots of neat facts about her. For example, she helped run her mom's hotel back in Austria with her sister before deciding she didn't want to do this for the rest of her life, selling the place, and spending months at a time traveling and getting world experiences. From working with an animal group in Bolivia, traveling through Indonesia, and being a waitress in Barcelona, the girl needs to be profiled in some travel magazine. Or get a shout-out here.
Another fun fact, Judith tells me that while Arnold Schwarzenegger speaks English in a German accent, he also speaks German with an American accent. That puts him at 0-2 with 2 strikeouts in the language department and a clean up spot on any Giants lineup from the past 4 years.
Janice:
combine stats: Female, American, 5'9", wife, mother, student, early 40s.
Looking for a career change and wanting to explore new interests, Janice is back in school studying about the environment at UCLA. She'll be my buddy on all of my adventures and it's been great. Been here a week and she wants to see if she can get a place for retirement.
Wanda:
combine stats: Thai, 2", blue, fish.
Bought a betta fish for 10 cents at the market the other day. Judith thinks it won't live very long. I'll prove her wrong. I'll be an awesome fish daddy.
Okay, let's talk about food!
The food here has been nothing short of explosions of tastes and flavors. Here are some of the noteworthy dishes:
Pork balls on a stick: Name says it all, but this get the Karate Kid (2010) Award for things that are better than it looks. Side note, this may get replaced as the Avatar: Last Airbender Award. These white marble-sized balls on a skewer are sneaky delicious. Looking rather plain and appearing to be void of flavor, I was expecting something boring and obvious on par with Ricky Martin coming out of the closet. I was pleasantly surprised. Served with a small chili paste sauce, the pork balls are one of the most snackable foods out there.
Chicken or pork fried rice: I'm a big rice guy, and Thailand does not disappoint. All of the places where I've ordered fried rice have been great, but this one place right next to the apartment is the Manny Pacquiao of fried rice. The golden plate-full of rice contains fried egg, fried pieces of pork (real pieces of pork, not the lame completely processed type aka US pork), leafy green to keep me health and a refreshing side of diced cucumbers for when I'm done. It's absolutely fantastic.
Tom yum: One of the popular soups here. Has a bunch of vegetables, glass noodles, a meat, and liver. It's usually pretty spicy. I'm not a big soup person - they don't really fill me up - so I'll just leave it at that.
Burmese grilled chicken: This is one of the dishes they served to us at the school. Tasty, but a tad salty.
Fried chicken bits: Basically like a popcorn chicken type of deal that has a Popeye's Chicken times 5 level of spiciness to it. Really good, although definitely wasn't expecting that kind of zip to it. My dad would've loved it, though.
Yellow curry: Surprisingly, this was the most mild thing I've had here. Beautiful stuff. Only hiccup was that it didn't come with rice.
Fish: Karen's boyfriend Pet made an awesome fish dish with this sweet chili sauce. I don't know my fish, but I do know that it was good.
Sugar: This isn't about my personal experience tasting sugar sweets here, but more about the diet of the kids at the Burmese Learning Center where Janice and I were teaching English this past week. The kids, whether because of their poor living circumstances or some other reason, eat sweets and candy all the time. For "breakfast" right before classes start, take out packages of candy or go to the store nearby and purchase frozen juices pumped with sugar. Some of them I wouldn't even call candy. Instead, they are literally pellets of pure sugar. They look like something you would feed to a horse. These sugar pellets are made from the Coca Cola Company, which can be tacked on to the large list of bad things that the corporation does. Exploitation of people, destruction of the environment, the reinforcement of the divide between the have and have-nots. Eff you Coca Cola man. The children's food choices carry on throughout the morning and then the afternoon. Lunch is a little better, because the kids bring boxes that have rice and several side dishes. Besides that, though, they are without a paddle. As a result, their teeth are rotting; some have only little bits that barely manage to hang to their gums. My parents had me bring over toothbrushes for the students, and it was definitely something that they needed. Whether they are able to use them or not, it's important to reinforce the need for some kind of oral care. Seeing their excitement in receiving such a small thing as a toothbrush made me realize how easy it is to make a difference. Throughout all the problems going on out there in the world, we all want to try and change things. We have these lofty, ambitious dreams of having an impact. But in reality, through what I've seen since I've been here, it's the little triumphs that set in motion the mechanisms of change. Giving someone a pencil or a toothbrush. I never realized.
Grilled frog: This requires a bit of a story. Last Saturday night, Janice, Judith, and I went to the local bar for some live music, food, and World Cup action. We got our own table in the open air tiki hut style set-up in the place, the only foreigners. We were enjoying ourselves and the warm atmosphere, but there were curious eyes glancing over from time to time. At one point, a man got up in front oft he band area and gave a speech in Thai to the patrons. When he was done, everyone stood up and broke out in a Happy Birthday song for the man. We joined them.
We were in. That must've been an initiation for us, because for the rest of the night, people sent us food and drinks, while we all danced, laughed, and had a good time. One of the dishes was a big serving of diced up meat. I thought it was some type of beef. Later, we learnd it was frog.
Stay away from the frog. It was the spiciest thing I've had. I can't describe it any other way. The only person I can think of who can do it justice is Randy Jackson:
"Yo dawg', ya know that wasn't your best performance. I wasn't feeling it, got kinda pitchy. It wasn't really your thing. All this time I'm thinking your chicken or beef, but you come out with this ya know? That whole chili mixed with the frog. You made it this far and you just can't be doing that yo. But you know, I still love you."
And so it goes.
The cast of characters:
Karen:
draft combine stats: Female, 5'8", blonde, mid 40s, Scottish, 5.4 40 time, 25 inch vertical...
The volunteer coordinator here at Andaman Discoveries. A young at heart type with an outgoing personality to boot, Karen hails from the land of bagpipes and kilts. She's the high-energy one of the group, the Joakim Noah type. Not excessively flashy, puts in work day in and day, and total team player. Gotta like her. Since she's Scottish, the locals here joke that they've had to adjust to learning English and Karen's English.
Bodhi:
combine stats: Male, 6' something, brown hair, Berkeley grad, newly married, late 20s or early 30s, first round status
One of the head honcos at Andaman Discoveries. He's been out of the area for most of my first week here. Just had a chance for us to introduce, but definitely has that good-guy vibe to him, really chill.
Laura:
combine stats: Female, the 23-year old Frenchie, black hair, 5'5"
She's been here since February as part of this European program that allows young people to assimilate themselves into different cultures to gain tools and experiences that they can take back home. As part of her learning experience, she's been taking Thai cooking lessons from Bodhi's wife every Tuesday. Word around the campfire is that she can make a killer fish curry. She heads back in October.
Nan:
combine stats: Female, Thai, 5'5", black hair, mid to late 20s, sat out her workouts due to an injured wrist and is listed as day-to-day.
She's one of the locals and is Laura's roommate. This is kinda neat, because it turns out that all of these people live on the same street. I think that's another really cool part about the people here in Thailand, that sense of "together-ness" with everyone and wantinng to be close to one another. Ubuntu! Maybe it's because of the air here in Thailand that causes people to behave like this. I'm starting to think any problem can be solved if people went to Thailand: healthcare, Bloods vs Crips, North vs South Korea, Snooki vs any normal human being. Also, Nan has a motorbike and, like many of the Thais here, uses it for any and all situations. Need to go 13 miles to the beach. Motorbike. Need to go back home. Motorbike. Need to go to the store one block over. Motorbike. Commitment to a cause.
Peanut:
combine stats: Female, Thai, 5'6", black hair usually tied in a bun, limited tolerance to spicy food.
Another local Thai. She's super sweet, and I love how she goes by Peanut.
Tui:
combine stats: Female, Thai, 5'6", long black hair usually in a ponytail, late 20s or early 30s.
She's been working with Andaman Discoveries for several years now. Again, she's very nice and has been our translator when need be. Can't be said enough about how nice people here are. Everywhere you go, people are greeting you and smiling like they actually mean it. None of this "hey, I don't really want to talk to you and I have to be somewhere" greeting that LA has a patent over.
Judith:
combine stats: Female, Austrian, 5'7", blonde, early 30s.
She's one of the interns with Andaman Discoveries who will be with them for the next two months. Then she'll head back to Europe to get her master's in sustainable tourism, but for right now she lives in the room across from me at the apartment. Lots of neat facts about her. For example, she helped run her mom's hotel back in Austria with her sister before deciding she didn't want to do this for the rest of her life, selling the place, and spending months at a time traveling and getting world experiences. From working with an animal group in Bolivia, traveling through Indonesia, and being a waitress in Barcelona, the girl needs to be profiled in some travel magazine. Or get a shout-out here.
Another fun fact, Judith tells me that while Arnold Schwarzenegger speaks English in a German accent, he also speaks German with an American accent. That puts him at 0-2 with 2 strikeouts in the language department and a clean up spot on any Giants lineup from the past 4 years.
Janice:
combine stats: Female, American, 5'9", wife, mother, student, early 40s.
Looking for a career change and wanting to explore new interests, Janice is back in school studying about the environment at UCLA. She'll be my buddy on all of my adventures and it's been great. Been here a week and she wants to see if she can get a place for retirement.
Wanda:
combine stats: Thai, 2", blue, fish.
Bought a betta fish for 10 cents at the market the other day. Judith thinks it won't live very long. I'll prove her wrong. I'll be an awesome fish daddy.
Okay, let's talk about food!
The food here has been nothing short of explosions of tastes and flavors. Here are some of the noteworthy dishes:
Pork balls on a stick: Name says it all, but this get the Karate Kid (2010) Award for things that are better than it looks. Side note, this may get replaced as the Avatar: Last Airbender Award. These white marble-sized balls on a skewer are sneaky delicious. Looking rather plain and appearing to be void of flavor, I was expecting something boring and obvious on par with Ricky Martin coming out of the closet. I was pleasantly surprised. Served with a small chili paste sauce, the pork balls are one of the most snackable foods out there.
Chicken or pork fried rice: I'm a big rice guy, and Thailand does not disappoint. All of the places where I've ordered fried rice have been great, but this one place right next to the apartment is the Manny Pacquiao of fried rice. The golden plate-full of rice contains fried egg, fried pieces of pork (real pieces of pork, not the lame completely processed type aka US pork), leafy green to keep me health and a refreshing side of diced cucumbers for when I'm done. It's absolutely fantastic.
Tom yum: One of the popular soups here. Has a bunch of vegetables, glass noodles, a meat, and liver. It's usually pretty spicy. I'm not a big soup person - they don't really fill me up - so I'll just leave it at that.
Burmese grilled chicken: This is one of the dishes they served to us at the school. Tasty, but a tad salty.
Fried chicken bits: Basically like a popcorn chicken type of deal that has a Popeye's Chicken times 5 level of spiciness to it. Really good, although definitely wasn't expecting that kind of zip to it. My dad would've loved it, though.
Yellow curry: Surprisingly, this was the most mild thing I've had here. Beautiful stuff. Only hiccup was that it didn't come with rice.
Fish: Karen's boyfriend Pet made an awesome fish dish with this sweet chili sauce. I don't know my fish, but I do know that it was good.
Sugar: This isn't about my personal experience tasting sugar sweets here, but more about the diet of the kids at the Burmese Learning Center where Janice and I were teaching English this past week. The kids, whether because of their poor living circumstances or some other reason, eat sweets and candy all the time. For "breakfast" right before classes start, take out packages of candy or go to the store nearby and purchase frozen juices pumped with sugar. Some of them I wouldn't even call candy. Instead, they are literally pellets of pure sugar. They look like something you would feed to a horse. These sugar pellets are made from the Coca Cola Company, which can be tacked on to the large list of bad things that the corporation does. Exploitation of people, destruction of the environment, the reinforcement of the divide between the have and have-nots. Eff you Coca Cola man. The children's food choices carry on throughout the morning and then the afternoon. Lunch is a little better, because the kids bring boxes that have rice and several side dishes. Besides that, though, they are without a paddle. As a result, their teeth are rotting; some have only little bits that barely manage to hang to their gums. My parents had me bring over toothbrushes for the students, and it was definitely something that they needed. Whether they are able to use them or not, it's important to reinforce the need for some kind of oral care. Seeing their excitement in receiving such a small thing as a toothbrush made me realize how easy it is to make a difference. Throughout all the problems going on out there in the world, we all want to try and change things. We have these lofty, ambitious dreams of having an impact. But in reality, through what I've seen since I've been here, it's the little triumphs that set in motion the mechanisms of change. Giving someone a pencil or a toothbrush. I never realized.
Grilled frog: This requires a bit of a story. Last Saturday night, Janice, Judith, and I went to the local bar for some live music, food, and World Cup action. We got our own table in the open air tiki hut style set-up in the place, the only foreigners. We were enjoying ourselves and the warm atmosphere, but there were curious eyes glancing over from time to time. At one point, a man got up in front oft he band area and gave a speech in Thai to the patrons. When he was done, everyone stood up and broke out in a Happy Birthday song for the man. We joined them.
We were in. That must've been an initiation for us, because for the rest of the night, people sent us food and drinks, while we all danced, laughed, and had a good time. One of the dishes was a big serving of diced up meat. I thought it was some type of beef. Later, we learnd it was frog.
Stay away from the frog. It was the spiciest thing I've had. I can't describe it any other way. The only person I can think of who can do it justice is Randy Jackson:
"Yo dawg', ya know that wasn't your best performance. I wasn't feeling it, got kinda pitchy. It wasn't really your thing. All this time I'm thinking your chicken or beef, but you come out with this ya know? That whole chili mixed with the frog. You made it this far and you just can't be doing that yo. But you know, I still love you."
And so it goes.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Going With the Flow
Reason number 526, ahead of not having to shave below the face and behind having phone conversations that last no more than 2.5 minutes, why I'm happier to be a guy than a girl: being able to stand up for squat toilets. Squat toilets, for me at least, are neat little novelty bits in the realm of culture shock. Swapping the beautiful porcelain Western toilet with a hole in the ground and a bucket to flush, the squat toilet represents everything about my experience here in Thailand: raw, unique, new perspectives, but it starts to stink if you don't clean and rinse it out. For while the squat toilet definitely has its own tradition and history deeply embedded in Asian culture, there are three big reasons why I miss the comfort of home:
1. Squat toilet usually means no sink. At most bathrooms here in Thailand, what you'll find are four simple things: hole in the floor, big bucket, water in the big bucket, and a small bucket. After you do your business, you use the small bucket to gather water from the big bucket and dump it in the hole. Somehow, someway, the water flushes everything away in the hole (which, as a side note, completely blows my mind. What is the freaking physics behind this thing? How is it that a few ounces of water are able to completely flush all of that business. I need some kind of engineer to explain this to me with full-fledged diagrams and pictures - I expect nothing less. There has to be some kind of complex plumbing system to this deal. Sure, we live in a world where we can send people to the moon, create weapons that can wipe out total cities, and Ryan Seacrest makes millions and millions for doing whatever the hell he does, but the most amazing accomplishment has to include the squat toilet. Sneakily underrated.
2. It gets really dirty, especially if people don't wash out and flush the thing. Imagine a port-o-potty but if it was used by Pablo Sandoval who, with the intensity of a jackrabbit in heat, just ate at a Chinese buffet, but the orange chicken turned out to have salmonella. Then have that fester for a few days. Imagine, and even then it may not be a full comparison. The Burmese school we're teaching at has this level of bathroom destruction. Granted, most of the kids are seven or so, so you can't really blame them for not wanting to help clean up what's already Kung Pao Panda bathroom status, but man, it can get pretty bad. The kids are absolutely great, because:
a. They really want to learn, and their curiousities run amock once foreigners step inside the classroom. And since their school is in limited shape (no ventillation, not enough textbooks, feeble roofs that leak when it rains, etc), anything and everything to them goes a long way. For example, Janice, my partner in crime here with the program, brought pencils for the students. They completely ate it all up. Most of them had only little stubs of what were once pencils to do math problems, grammar lessons, and homework assignments. Just a simple thing like that - pencils - made a huge difference.
b. Their innovative. With very few things at their disposal, the kids are forced to think on their feet, which is most evident at recess. They don't have many toys at the school, but that doesn't mean they can't have fun. One of the kids was able to turn a single square block of wood at the garbage heap and turn it into a slingshot, a train, and other little games. All those kids playing at recess undoubtably had more collective creativity than the suits who gave Paris Hilton and her friend their own show.
c. Absolutely adorable. Makes me wonder how difficult it would be to make it through customs with one of them in my bag.
With that said, the bathroom is an abomination.
3. Squatting to use a toilet is not fun. Seriously, I don't need to be burning calories and getting a mini-workout for me to do my business. Like full-fledged P90X level of calories...it has to be a legit squat or else you're taking a nose dive straight into that bowl. Sometimes you get the feeling that Tony Horton should be standing right there giving you pieces of advice "Wide stance! Wide Stance!" This is why I'm totally happy that I have my man card. Don't have to squat to go Number 1. Just have to stand there and make it urinal status.
The police in Thailand, it seems, don't work. We know that there are a good number of policemen in the area since there was a group of 10 or so at the bar the second night I was here, but during the day - nothing. Because of that, drivers have to be alert at all times when dealing with pedestrians, sharing the lane with motorbikes, oncoming traffic, and the like. The car horns, therefore, have been modified (since people are constantly honking them to get another's attention to move). Since no one wants to hear the incessant barrage of LA "eff you I'm coming by and I will run you over like I did Brad Pitt in Meet Joe Black," cars are instead equipped with what can only be described as light, airy, poodle-like "yip" sounds.
Yip, yip, yip yip yip.
And apparently, I'm Thai. For people here, their conception of an American is white with blonde hair. So literally every conversation with a local, whether at the market, a beach, the apartment, or school has gone like this...
Local Thai: (says something in Thai)
Me: Sorry, English please?
Local Thai: (Surprised) Where you from?
Me: America.
Local Thai: You Asian.
Me: Yeah, but I'm American.
Local Thai: (Laughs) You Asian.
Which is when I have to explain my ethnic background, and let them realize I am really from America. One time at a market, one of the vendors seemingly didn't believe me, and just went back to talking in Thai to me.
Another thing, All Terrain needs to make better bottles for their insect repellent. I've been lathering myself in their all natural deet-free lotion (don't want to use deet products in fear of getting cancer or eventually turning into those Nazis from the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark). The repellent works great, but the bottle needs to go back to their R&D offices. The cap does not stay shut. Any slight movement or squeeze of the bottle takes off the top faster than RollerGirl from that one deleted scene in Boogie Nights. Because of that, the left pant pocket from all four pairs of my pants have been completely drenched in insect repellent lotion.
Wish I had pictures to prove it, but there is a video store in a town a couple miles over that sells what have to be bootleg copies of newly released movies for cheap. The best part, though, is the covers of these movies - they have nothing to do with the movie at all. They're all badly photoshopped picture edited together by some guy who must have been given the instructions, "Here, we're not going to let you watch the movie, but from the title alone, give us a cover about what you think it's about."
My favorite example was the cover of Gran Torino. The center of the cover has a picture of Clint Eastwood straight from the movie's poster (the one with him turned sideways, holding a shotgun, and grimacing with his "I'm really old"/"I think I might be constipated" look), but the similarities end there. The font of the movie's title is some weird Gothic-style one with skinny and pointy letters that I feel as though Microsoft Word made obsolete several years ago, because, well, it's not a real font any good person would want to use. Surrounding him are pictures of very poor rural Asian kids who have that "This is the first time I've ever seen a camera before so I should be smiling, but I haven't eaten anything in days" face to them. There is also a bright blue Chevy in the upper left corner. But the most inexplicable thing is in the lower right side: a young Sigourney Weaver-type wearing a blood-covered wife-beater shirt while holding a chainsaw.
My thoughts exactly.
a. They really want to learn, and their curiousities run amock once foreigners step inside the classroom. And since their school is in limited shape (no ventillation, not enough textbooks, feeble roofs that leak when it rains, etc), anything and everything to them goes a long way. For example, Janice, my partner in crime here with the program, brought pencils for the students. They completely ate it all up. Most of them had only little stubs of what were once pencils to do math problems, grammar lessons, and homework assignments. Just a simple thing like that - pencils - made a huge difference.
b. Their innovative. With very few things at their disposal, the kids are forced to think on their feet, which is most evident at recess. They don't have many toys at the school, but that doesn't mean they can't have fun. One of the kids was able to turn a single square block of wood at the garbage heap and turn it into a slingshot, a train, and other little games. All those kids playing at recess undoubtably had more collective creativity than the suits who gave Paris Hilton and her friend their own show.
c. Absolutely adorable. Makes me wonder how difficult it would be to make it through customs with one of them in my bag.
With that said, the bathroom is an abomination.
3. Squatting to use a toilet is not fun. Seriously, I don't need to be burning calories and getting a mini-workout for me to do my business. Like full-fledged P90X level of calories...it has to be a legit squat or else you're taking a nose dive straight into that bowl. Sometimes you get the feeling that Tony Horton should be standing right there giving you pieces of advice "Wide stance! Wide Stance!" This is why I'm totally happy that I have my man card. Don't have to squat to go Number 1. Just have to stand there and make it urinal status.
The police in Thailand, it seems, don't work. We know that there are a good number of policemen in the area since there was a group of 10 or so at the bar the second night I was here, but during the day - nothing. Because of that, drivers have to be alert at all times when dealing with pedestrians, sharing the lane with motorbikes, oncoming traffic, and the like. The car horns, therefore, have been modified (since people are constantly honking them to get another's attention to move). Since no one wants to hear the incessant barrage of LA "eff you I'm coming by and I will run you over like I did Brad Pitt in Meet Joe Black," cars are instead equipped with what can only be described as light, airy, poodle-like "yip" sounds.
Yip, yip, yip yip yip.
And apparently, I'm Thai. For people here, their conception of an American is white with blonde hair. So literally every conversation with a local, whether at the market, a beach, the apartment, or school has gone like this...
Local Thai: (says something in Thai)
Me: Sorry, English please?
Local Thai: (Surprised) Where you from?
Me: America.
Local Thai: You Asian.
Me: Yeah, but I'm American.
Local Thai: (Laughs) You Asian.
Which is when I have to explain my ethnic background, and let them realize I am really from America. One time at a market, one of the vendors seemingly didn't believe me, and just went back to talking in Thai to me.
Another thing, All Terrain needs to make better bottles for their insect repellent. I've been lathering myself in their all natural deet-free lotion (don't want to use deet products in fear of getting cancer or eventually turning into those Nazis from the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark). The repellent works great, but the bottle needs to go back to their R&D offices. The cap does not stay shut. Any slight movement or squeeze of the bottle takes off the top faster than RollerGirl from that one deleted scene in Boogie Nights. Because of that, the left pant pocket from all four pairs of my pants have been completely drenched in insect repellent lotion.
Wish I had pictures to prove it, but there is a video store in a town a couple miles over that sells what have to be bootleg copies of newly released movies for cheap. The best part, though, is the covers of these movies - they have nothing to do with the movie at all. They're all badly photoshopped picture edited together by some guy who must have been given the instructions, "Here, we're not going to let you watch the movie, but from the title alone, give us a cover about what you think it's about."
My favorite example was the cover of Gran Torino. The center of the cover has a picture of Clint Eastwood straight from the movie's poster (the one with him turned sideways, holding a shotgun, and grimacing with his "I'm really old"/"I think I might be constipated" look), but the similarities end there. The font of the movie's title is some weird Gothic-style one with skinny and pointy letters that I feel as though Microsoft Word made obsolete several years ago, because, well, it's not a real font any good person would want to use. Surrounding him are pictures of very poor rural Asian kids who have that "This is the first time I've ever seen a camera before so I should be smiling, but I haven't eaten anything in days" face to them. There is also a bright blue Chevy in the upper left corner. But the most inexplicable thing is in the lower right side: a young Sigourney Weaver-type wearing a blood-covered wife-beater shirt while holding a chainsaw.
My thoughts exactly.
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Massages and Other Things Unrelated
My travels here seem to mirror that of the new Karate Kid movie, with me taking over Will Smith's son's role. American, having lived all of his life in comfort and familiarity, is uprooted and forced to live in a foreign country. New home, new neighborhood, new school, new food, new people, new language. There is some culture shock, and, having been alienated from people his age because he doesn't fit in the right group and the bully Asian kid picks on him, he decides to learn kung fu (in my case, muay thai boxing), become an expert in less than a month to fight in a no-holds barred sparring tournament, win with a crane kick to the bully Asian kid's face, and finally get the girl. Actually, the first half of that is more in-sync with what's going on here than the second part.
But here are some real notes about what's been going on:
Time here seems to stop. It's a fragment of raw and exceptional beauty tucked away into the world's pocket, a part of paradise. There really can't be any other way to put it. Located three hours away from Phuket, Kuraburi is a small town stripped of everything remotely close to Western. A central road with six lanes going each way cuts through the heart of the town, decorated by shops and restaurants on each side. From the local cell phone store to the pork fried rice place to the 7-11, the town is a tightly woven community, each person knowing his or her part in helping the group as a whole. Another important facet are the morning and evening markets. During the beginning and ending of the day, tents and vendors line the streets entertaining passer-byers with their mouth-watering food, exotic beverages, and clothing. One of the local Thai women batters up a mix and puts it in a waffle maker, churning out delicious coconut flavored waffles, while kids runs down the streets and guys on their motorbikes whiz through to check out the scene.
Motorbikes, though, cannot be emphasized enough. Those seem to be the most popular forms of transportation around, as people young and old are constantly zipping along the streets. Partly due to their ability to cut through narrow and unpaved roads and their relatively cheap cost, motorbikes are to Thailand what fast food is to the US.
For the next week I'll be teaching Burmese children English, so I went to the school several days ago to check out the area. One word to describe the Burmese living community: dilapidated. Located 20 minutes from my base location, most of the Burmese people are not legal residents of Thailand. They are a nation of people who are not formally recognized. Forced to take menial low-paying jobs, the people live in extreme poverty. They literally live in slums. Their shanty housing situation is characterized by broken down rooms and windows, poor plumbing, holes in the roofs, cardboard coverings tossed everywhere, and a river containing decrepit long boats and dark waters brimming with trash. The elementary school itself is unsurprisingly in poor conditions. No windows, a makeshift fence, dirt floors, broken school desks that look like those from Dead Poet's Society except if Robin Williams had his kids - instead of simply stand - jump up and down and then smash them with a baseball bat with the same intensity as Ron Livingston and the gang from Office Space. While it would seem that this would lead to difficult learning situations, the children are all wide-eyed and enthusiastic. They run around with energy and enthusiasm, playing with each other and collectively having a curiosity that would be hard to match elsewhere. Before this trip, my parents had me bring toothbrushes to give to the children and it is apparent that these boys and girls definitely need the oral hygiene care. Their smiles give way to a deeper understanding of how unfortunate it is to live in this community. The remnants of their baby teeth are nothing but brown stubbles, a reflection of the many sweets they eat - too poor to purchase healthier alternatives.
On Saturday, a few of us went to the Ranong province where I had my first oil massage. For the price of about $45, I had an hour session at the jacuzzi and sauna followed by what came out to be a two hour date with my masseuse. First off, before you go and actually get your massage, they have you put on a pair of draw-string pants and a button-up shirt. However, the pants are the most impossible things to put on. Considering that pieces of luggage now come with pamphlets of instructions, draw-string massage pants should also. The pants themselves seemed to be custom-made for Eddie Murphy back when he was making The Nutty Professor. Large enough to fit two-and-a-half me's, I had to wrap the draw string several times around my waist before it was tight enough for them to stay on. Apparently my wardrobe wasn't correct, because the moment I stepped out the three Thai employees broke out in complete laughter.
Instruction manuals, I'm telling you.
You then get a chance to pick out the oils you want the masseuse to lather you up in. I picked jasmine, which is the machoist oil a guy can put on (or so I tell myself). Then you go behind the curtain and lay down on the table...I was giddy.
Brief side note, this past year was fueled by a lot of stressful episodes. Imagine it as a mix between being the PR person for Lindsey Lohan and Heidi Montag's dignity. So I was ready for some loosening of the muscles.
However, I did not really know what to expect from this massage.
Here are a few things you need to know.
First off, you're naked, which took me for a loop. So the masseuse, knowing very limited English, had to motion with her hands to take off my the draw-string instruction manual needed pants and underwear.
Second, after you're naked, you don't wrap the towel around you and lay on the table. Instead, you lay the towel over your body. This took me by surprise as the first thing the Thai woman tried to do when she came in was immediately unravel me like a pig in a blanket. This led to confused looks by and her speaking in choppy English about what I thought was something along the lines of bad sushi.
Third, there's a "no-fly zone" in terms of where the masseuse will oil you up and massage, but it's a very small one. It's about the size of the basketball hoop when Rajon Rondo is at the free-throw line. So the masseuse will definitely work his or her way around the body. At the beginning, I felt like Marlon Brando in Apocalypse Now..."The horror, the horror..." In short, there was almost point where I would've considered getting a verification form for my doctor that I got a prostate exam. But hey, I smell like jasmine, the manliest oil out there.
Finally, around halfway through the massage, the masseuse will lift up the towel covering you and ask you to turn over. This isn't very useful if she tells you in Thai. Instead, I had the woman pull the towel off, say something, and then stare at me. Not helpful at all.
But here are some real notes about what's been going on:
Time here seems to stop. It's a fragment of raw and exceptional beauty tucked away into the world's pocket, a part of paradise. There really can't be any other way to put it. Located three hours away from Phuket, Kuraburi is a small town stripped of everything remotely close to Western. A central road with six lanes going each way cuts through the heart of the town, decorated by shops and restaurants on each side. From the local cell phone store to the pork fried rice place to the 7-11, the town is a tightly woven community, each person knowing his or her part in helping the group as a whole. Another important facet are the morning and evening markets. During the beginning and ending of the day, tents and vendors line the streets entertaining passer-byers with their mouth-watering food, exotic beverages, and clothing. One of the local Thai women batters up a mix and puts it in a waffle maker, churning out delicious coconut flavored waffles, while kids runs down the streets and guys on their motorbikes whiz through to check out the scene.
Motorbikes, though, cannot be emphasized enough. Those seem to be the most popular forms of transportation around, as people young and old are constantly zipping along the streets. Partly due to their ability to cut through narrow and unpaved roads and their relatively cheap cost, motorbikes are to Thailand what fast food is to the US.
For the next week I'll be teaching Burmese children English, so I went to the school several days ago to check out the area. One word to describe the Burmese living community: dilapidated. Located 20 minutes from my base location, most of the Burmese people are not legal residents of Thailand. They are a nation of people who are not formally recognized. Forced to take menial low-paying jobs, the people live in extreme poverty. They literally live in slums. Their shanty housing situation is characterized by broken down rooms and windows, poor plumbing, holes in the roofs, cardboard coverings tossed everywhere, and a river containing decrepit long boats and dark waters brimming with trash. The elementary school itself is unsurprisingly in poor conditions. No windows, a makeshift fence, dirt floors, broken school desks that look like those from Dead Poet's Society except if Robin Williams had his kids - instead of simply stand - jump up and down and then smash them with a baseball bat with the same intensity as Ron Livingston and the gang from Office Space. While it would seem that this would lead to difficult learning situations, the children are all wide-eyed and enthusiastic. They run around with energy and enthusiasm, playing with each other and collectively having a curiosity that would be hard to match elsewhere. Before this trip, my parents had me bring toothbrushes to give to the children and it is apparent that these boys and girls definitely need the oral hygiene care. Their smiles give way to a deeper understanding of how unfortunate it is to live in this community. The remnants of their baby teeth are nothing but brown stubbles, a reflection of the many sweets they eat - too poor to purchase healthier alternatives.
On Saturday, a few of us went to the Ranong province where I had my first oil massage. For the price of about $45, I had an hour session at the jacuzzi and sauna followed by what came out to be a two hour date with my masseuse. First off, before you go and actually get your massage, they have you put on a pair of draw-string pants and a button-up shirt. However, the pants are the most impossible things to put on. Considering that pieces of luggage now come with pamphlets of instructions, draw-string massage pants should also. The pants themselves seemed to be custom-made for Eddie Murphy back when he was making The Nutty Professor. Large enough to fit two-and-a-half me's, I had to wrap the draw string several times around my waist before it was tight enough for them to stay on. Apparently my wardrobe wasn't correct, because the moment I stepped out the three Thai employees broke out in complete laughter.
Instruction manuals, I'm telling you.
You then get a chance to pick out the oils you want the masseuse to lather you up in. I picked jasmine, which is the machoist oil a guy can put on (or so I tell myself). Then you go behind the curtain and lay down on the table...I was giddy.
Brief side note, this past year was fueled by a lot of stressful episodes. Imagine it as a mix between being the PR person for Lindsey Lohan and Heidi Montag's dignity. So I was ready for some loosening of the muscles.
However, I did not really know what to expect from this massage.
Here are a few things you need to know.
First off, you're naked, which took me for a loop. So the masseuse, knowing very limited English, had to motion with her hands to take off my the draw-string instruction manual needed pants and underwear.
Second, after you're naked, you don't wrap the towel around you and lay on the table. Instead, you lay the towel over your body. This took me by surprise as the first thing the Thai woman tried to do when she came in was immediately unravel me like a pig in a blanket. This led to confused looks by and her speaking in choppy English about what I thought was something along the lines of bad sushi.
Third, there's a "no-fly zone" in terms of where the masseuse will oil you up and massage, but it's a very small one. It's about the size of the basketball hoop when Rajon Rondo is at the free-throw line. So the masseuse will definitely work his or her way around the body. At the beginning, I felt like Marlon Brando in Apocalypse Now..."The horror, the horror..." In short, there was almost point where I would've considered getting a verification form for my doctor that I got a prostate exam. But hey, I smell like jasmine, the manliest oil out there.
Finally, around halfway through the massage, the masseuse will lift up the towel covering you and ask you to turn over. This isn't very useful if she tells you in Thai. Instead, I had the woman pull the towel off, say something, and then stare at me. Not helpful at all.
Friday, June 18, 2010
First 24 hours or: How I Became Enemies with Taiwan Robert Forster
Alright! Let's throw it back to the myspace days and blog the hell out of this thing. While I've been in Thailand for almost 24 hours now, accounting for travel time, layovers, trips to airport food courts, in-flight movies, shuttling back and forth from terminal to terminal to apartment to brothel (just kidding Mom, honest), it's been almost 4,325 hours since I've left home and only now I am starting my first post. This is unacceptable. Almost like not being able to save goals. Yes, looking at you Robert Green.
Not just 'cause it happened once...but twice:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uGGuL9BnWQ
Anyhoot, 4,325 hours worth of lost blogging is hard to make up, but lemme try as I use a retroactive diary and random musings on this bad boy:
6/15-17
Don't fly China Air. Seriously, don't. China can have its super small cell phones, stupid fast Internet access, and cheap and reliable cars, but please for the love of (insert deity here) do not let it have an airplane service. That thing should be laid to rest like a thirteen year old Labrador with a broken leg and late stages of cataracts.
First off, I thought it was part of the Geneva Conventions for airplanes to have at least five feet of legroom. Either China has decided not to follow this protocol in which case Jack Bauer should be immediately sent over for "diplomatic hearings" and pistol whip every China Air employee until justice is served, or China did not get the memo. Because less than a foot of space is a crime against humanity. Now imagine sitting like this for thirteen hours. Hitler couldn't concoct something worse. Luckily, I sat in the aisle seat so any and all bathroom breaks or leg stretches didn't have to involve me straddling over two other dudes. However, when the guys sitting next to me had to stand up and get out...that's when we started to have big problems...which leads to "passing over" etiquette. In all situations, no matter if you're a guy or a girl, I thought there's an unwritten rule that says you must always pass over someone in a seat/aisle/etc with your butt facing to them. Never the crotch. Never the crotch, because then you're facing that person and it's weird, uncomfortable, and just not necessary. Done deal. Case closed. At least it should be. I thought this was a universally understood law until I came to China Air and the guy sitting by the window had to get up to use the bathroom. Not only did he give me crotch, but I think I should've called the cops for giving an unwanted lap dance. This wouldn't have been a big issue, except the guy had to get out of his seat six times. Multiply that by two for going to the bathroom and back, and I had to experience twelve unwanted lap dances. Now I understand that at thirteen hours it's a long flight. But really? Six bathroom trips? All you're doing is sitting there. No reason for nature to call six times. So maybe this is an issue with China Air for providing the valued customer with little leg room or maybe this is an issue with this dude for not knowing the law. I blame both of them. Get Jack on the line.
There is another issue with China Air and that has to do with the in-flight movie. One of the cool things about long flights is that the airlines are able to play movies that have been recently released in theaters. And they tend to be pretty good movies. I remember watching The Bourne Supremacy a couple months after it was released on a flight. So one of the big highlights of this flight was the possibility of banking on 2-3 quality movies. Boy was I wrong. Now China Air has a nice feature you have your own personal screen displayed on the headrest in front of you, and you can pick your own movie to watch from a list. Also, you can rewind or fast forward the movie so you don't have to watch the whole 3 hours of Gladiator and instead seek out the 5 good fight sequences. Great! Sign me up!...These options aren't very useful if you want to skip the whole movie entirely.
Seriously, from the screen in front of me I had the pleasure of watching Valentine's Day, Letters From Julia, and some other Nicholas Sparks inspired movie.
Then there was the food. I wasn't expecting much in this department, having been weaned on most airlines that simply throw a bag of peanuts at you and call it a meal. China Air, thirteen hours...okay so perhaps two bags of peanuts. Instead I got bento box style compartments of pasta, fruit, and bread. Check that, airline pasta, airline fruit, and airline bread. It's an upgrade over the peanuts, but considering that with all the time changes on that flight, they gave us three meals. Three meals of airline food. No bueno.
Which leads me to this...
Airport Bathroom Power Rankings (in reverse order)!
4. Taiwan
Pros: The only thing Taiwan's bathroom has going for it is that it has variety. From the conventional urinal and Western toilet, it also offers the opportunity to use the squat toilet. That's about it.
Cons: It stinks and is a bit dirty. The tower dispenser uses a slot machine lever for it to roll out paper, which can be a hassle. Also, the toilets don't flush automatically. You need to push a button for five seconds for it to flush, which is always an adventure of "hmm, gotta wonder how many other hands have touched this dealio." However, the button itself, once pressed, releases a gyser of water around it that drowns your finger. Where is this water coming from? Why is it doing this? Why does it take five seconds for it to start? Why am I asking all these questions about a toilet? Moving on...
3. Bangkok
Pros: There are large partitions between the stalls that definitely provides a sense of security. The partitions are almost floor to ceiling, so you don't have to feel as if you're sharing the bathroom experience with Mr. Pale Legs next door. In addition, they have shiny metallic sinks and clean toilets.
Cons: No seat coverings. While the toilets are clean, there still needs to be seat coverings. That thin layer of paper is absolutely necessary, the only protection from contracting something worse than malaria.
2. Phuket
Pros: Clean, spacious, everything you would really want from a bathroom.
Cons: So what separates this from the number one bathroom...aesthetics. Phuket's bathrooms are cave-like dark, mostly because the walls are painted with a mix of depressed gray and black.
1. SFO (U-S-A)
Pros: Spacious (a dozen stalls, a dozen urinals, plenty of sinks), large mirrors, and it's the most technologically advanced of the ones listed with the use of authomatic hand dryers.
Cons: Can get dirty, but at least there are seat coverings.
Chalk that up as another win for Team USA.
One thing has to be acknowledged about the Taipei Airport in Taiwan. It needs to fix it's food court system at the international airport. Landing at the international airport, you're greeted with several shops, magazine stores, and a tech area. However, in terms of food, your options are limited to only one place called the Omni Cafe.
The Omni Cafe is set right next to Gate 6 and offers sandwiches, a rice plate, and noodle bowls. The sandwiches, though, are small, cold and limited to only chicken, ham and cheese, and tuna, which I would stay away from like MIA's "Born Free" music video. The sandwiches aren't especially fresh, evident by their use of the microwave to heat it up after you select one of the pre-made sandwiches. This would all be okay if they didn't price them up the caboose. Tack on a drink and you're paying $10 for your meal.
Again...unjust, inhumane, Geneva Conventions.
And yet, there is nothing you can do about it, because the Omni Cafe is the only food stop in the entire international terminal. The owner, who looks a lot like a Taiwan Robert Forster, holds an apparent cut-throat hold on the restaurant business in the Taiwan airport, monopolizing it in the form of sad sanwiches and expensive beverages.
Which led to this exchange:
Taiwan Robert Forster: That will be $10.
Me: (shocked) Kinda expensive, don't you think? (tentatively hand over money)
Taiwan Robert Forster: (snatches money) Silly boy, silly boy (grins, laughs, and walks away)
Taiwan Robert Forster, we will meet again.
Alrighty, since then I've landed in Thailand and I'm posted out in Kuraburi. I'll be particpating with a group called Andaman Discoveries, helping out in the communities. Mostly been checking out the area and meeting the people I'll be working with the past few hours.
Hopefully that was a good taste of some blog action. More to come in the next few days.
Not just 'cause it happened once...but twice:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uGGuL9BnWQ
Anyhoot, 4,325 hours worth of lost blogging is hard to make up, but lemme try as I use a retroactive diary and random musings on this bad boy:
6/15-17
Don't fly China Air. Seriously, don't. China can have its super small cell phones, stupid fast Internet access, and cheap and reliable cars, but please for the love of (insert deity here) do not let it have an airplane service. That thing should be laid to rest like a thirteen year old Labrador with a broken leg and late stages of cataracts.
First off, I thought it was part of the Geneva Conventions for airplanes to have at least five feet of legroom. Either China has decided not to follow this protocol in which case Jack Bauer should be immediately sent over for "diplomatic hearings" and pistol whip every China Air employee until justice is served, or China did not get the memo. Because less than a foot of space is a crime against humanity. Now imagine sitting like this for thirteen hours. Hitler couldn't concoct something worse. Luckily, I sat in the aisle seat so any and all bathroom breaks or leg stretches didn't have to involve me straddling over two other dudes. However, when the guys sitting next to me had to stand up and get out...that's when we started to have big problems...which leads to "passing over" etiquette. In all situations, no matter if you're a guy or a girl, I thought there's an unwritten rule that says you must always pass over someone in a seat/aisle/etc with your butt facing to them. Never the crotch. Never the crotch, because then you're facing that person and it's weird, uncomfortable, and just not necessary. Done deal. Case closed. At least it should be. I thought this was a universally understood law until I came to China Air and the guy sitting by the window had to get up to use the bathroom. Not only did he give me crotch, but I think I should've called the cops for giving an unwanted lap dance. This wouldn't have been a big issue, except the guy had to get out of his seat six times. Multiply that by two for going to the bathroom and back, and I had to experience twelve unwanted lap dances. Now I understand that at thirteen hours it's a long flight. But really? Six bathroom trips? All you're doing is sitting there. No reason for nature to call six times. So maybe this is an issue with China Air for providing the valued customer with little leg room or maybe this is an issue with this dude for not knowing the law. I blame both of them. Get Jack on the line.
There is another issue with China Air and that has to do with the in-flight movie. One of the cool things about long flights is that the airlines are able to play movies that have been recently released in theaters. And they tend to be pretty good movies. I remember watching The Bourne Supremacy a couple months after it was released on a flight. So one of the big highlights of this flight was the possibility of banking on 2-3 quality movies. Boy was I wrong. Now China Air has a nice feature you have your own personal screen displayed on the headrest in front of you, and you can pick your own movie to watch from a list. Also, you can rewind or fast forward the movie so you don't have to watch the whole 3 hours of Gladiator and instead seek out the 5 good fight sequences. Great! Sign me up!...These options aren't very useful if you want to skip the whole movie entirely.
Seriously, from the screen in front of me I had the pleasure of watching Valentine's Day, Letters From Julia, and some other Nicholas Sparks inspired movie.
Then there was the food. I wasn't expecting much in this department, having been weaned on most airlines that simply throw a bag of peanuts at you and call it a meal. China Air, thirteen hours...okay so perhaps two bags of peanuts. Instead I got bento box style compartments of pasta, fruit, and bread. Check that, airline pasta, airline fruit, and airline bread. It's an upgrade over the peanuts, but considering that with all the time changes on that flight, they gave us three meals. Three meals of airline food. No bueno.
Which leads me to this...
Airport Bathroom Power Rankings (in reverse order)!
4. Taiwan
Pros: The only thing Taiwan's bathroom has going for it is that it has variety. From the conventional urinal and Western toilet, it also offers the opportunity to use the squat toilet. That's about it.
Cons: It stinks and is a bit dirty. The tower dispenser uses a slot machine lever for it to roll out paper, which can be a hassle. Also, the toilets don't flush automatically. You need to push a button for five seconds for it to flush, which is always an adventure of "hmm, gotta wonder how many other hands have touched this dealio." However, the button itself, once pressed, releases a gyser of water around it that drowns your finger. Where is this water coming from? Why is it doing this? Why does it take five seconds for it to start? Why am I asking all these questions about a toilet? Moving on...
3. Bangkok
Pros: There are large partitions between the stalls that definitely provides a sense of security. The partitions are almost floor to ceiling, so you don't have to feel as if you're sharing the bathroom experience with Mr. Pale Legs next door. In addition, they have shiny metallic sinks and clean toilets.
Cons: No seat coverings. While the toilets are clean, there still needs to be seat coverings. That thin layer of paper is absolutely necessary, the only protection from contracting something worse than malaria.
2. Phuket
Pros: Clean, spacious, everything you would really want from a bathroom.
Cons: So what separates this from the number one bathroom...aesthetics. Phuket's bathrooms are cave-like dark, mostly because the walls are painted with a mix of depressed gray and black.
1. SFO (U-S-A)
Pros: Spacious (a dozen stalls, a dozen urinals, plenty of sinks), large mirrors, and it's the most technologically advanced of the ones listed with the use of authomatic hand dryers.
Cons: Can get dirty, but at least there are seat coverings.
Chalk that up as another win for Team USA.
One thing has to be acknowledged about the Taipei Airport in Taiwan. It needs to fix it's food court system at the international airport. Landing at the international airport, you're greeted with several shops, magazine stores, and a tech area. However, in terms of food, your options are limited to only one place called the Omni Cafe.
The Omni Cafe is set right next to Gate 6 and offers sandwiches, a rice plate, and noodle bowls. The sandwiches, though, are small, cold and limited to only chicken, ham and cheese, and tuna, which I would stay away from like MIA's "Born Free" music video. The sandwiches aren't especially fresh, evident by their use of the microwave to heat it up after you select one of the pre-made sandwiches. This would all be okay if they didn't price them up the caboose. Tack on a drink and you're paying $10 for your meal.
Again...unjust, inhumane, Geneva Conventions.
And yet, there is nothing you can do about it, because the Omni Cafe is the only food stop in the entire international terminal. The owner, who looks a lot like a Taiwan Robert Forster, holds an apparent cut-throat hold on the restaurant business in the Taiwan airport, monopolizing it in the form of sad sanwiches and expensive beverages.
Which led to this exchange:
Taiwan Robert Forster: That will be $10.
Me: (shocked) Kinda expensive, don't you think? (tentatively hand over money)
Taiwan Robert Forster: (snatches money) Silly boy, silly boy (grins, laughs, and walks away)
Taiwan Robert Forster, we will meet again.
Alrighty, since then I've landed in Thailand and I'm posted out in Kuraburi. I'll be particpating with a group called Andaman Discoveries, helping out in the communities. Mostly been checking out the area and meeting the people I'll be working with the past few hours.
Hopefully that was a good taste of some blog action. More to come in the next few days.
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